Catholic, sacramental marriages are beautiful. They are a sign of something greater. Trinitarian love. But the search for a life partner has been a challenge since the beginning of society. With the rise of technology, this pursuit is further complicated. People have become more comfortable staying home to watch TV or play video games or they find companionship through relationships that are exclusively on the internet.
There exists a prevalent stigma surrounding online dating. Online dating sounds impersonal and outdated. Additionally, online platforms like Tinder fuel the hookup culture, thus perpetuating the negative reputation of online dating among those looking for a lifelong spouse. But did you know online dating can actually be a valuable tool to finding a future spouse?
I know. It sounds crazy.
There are platforms out there who understand what dating is for: marriage. They understand what functions are useful and necessary to finding a good husband or wife. More and more sacramental marriages are aided by online apps like Catholic Match. I and many of my friends and family are those case studies!
Here's why online dating is great and why you should give it a try.
The Profile
The foundation of online dating are profiles. A profile is a summary of who you are. It's your storefront. A good profile should give people a brief but clear picture of who you are what you're looking for in a partner. This saves everyone time, money, and emotional energy. With online dating, you can search for exactly what you want and attract people who are looking for someone just like you. You can see the deal breakers upfront and decide if it's worth pursuing. No more wasting time and money on dates with people who are clearly not a good fit.
What a Good Profile Looks Like
A stellar dating profile is all about striking the right balance.
First off, it's crucial to have good photos—ones that accurately represent what you look like and even showcase your hobbies and interests. Think high-quality shots that highlight your best features without going overboard on the filters or editing.
And when it comes to the written part, your descriptions should be brimming with personality. This is your chance to let your voice shine through. Are you the witty, humorous type, or do you tend to be more introspective? Whether you're fond of big words or prefer a more casual tone, use this space to express what matters most to you and what you're seeking in a partner. I wouldn't judge you if you asked for help from a writer friend or even hired someone.
After all, your profile is like your personal billboard in a city full of singles—it's all about showing the world who you are and what you're looking for in a husband or wife.
What to Avoid in a Profile
Step one to avoid on a dating profile is deciding to create one if you're not ready for a serious relationship or if marriage isn't in your plans. Specifics to this are addressed by others more thoroughly than I could.
Secondly, be mindful of how you describe the person you're seeking in a spouse; being overly specific can unintentionally alienate potential matches. For example, I said, "I think Olaf the Snowman and Buddy the Elf are hilarious. If you don't think they are, you should probably move on."
Use high-quality photos that accurately represent yourself without airbrushing too much. Nothing is more off-putting than seeing one photo on a profile and getting to the in person date and the person looks completely different.
On a similar note, don't focus too much on negative aspects about yourself. As a human, we all have rough edges, so it might be worth mentioning some things, but consider addressing with humility an positivity. Strive for authenticity and transparency, even if it means acknowledging imperfections without sugarcoating your situation.
Search Filters
When I was navigating Catholic Match, the filter feature proved invaluable in finding exactly what I was looking for in a husband. Sure, you can search based on basic criteria like height and race, but the real magic happens when you can filter by specific beliefs and lifestyle preferences. Catholic Match goes above and beyond by allowing users to specify their stance on key pillars of the faith, such as the sanctity of life, papal infallibility, and traditional marriage. This level of customization ensures that you're connecting with individuals who share your core values and beliefs.
Expanding the Dating Pool
One of the benefits of telecommunications and the internet is it's incredible ability to connect people across the world. For online dating, this means you can find people who share your values regardless of location. You're no longer limited to the people you can meet in your area! The more people you meet, the more likely you're going to meet a winner.
Without online dating, I probably would never have met my husband. He lived in a completely different state and we had no mutual connections.
Things to Consider
Now, this wouldn't be an objective endorsement for online dating without acknowledging some potential drawbacks.
While it's great to connect with potential partners digitally, real-life interactions can be vastly different. Just like seeing a celebrity on screen versus in person, meeting someone face-to-face can reveal nuances that aren't apparent online. When you're texting someone, you miss out on crucial elements like eye contact, voice inflections, body language, and facial expressions. Even smell...
Moreover, the digital realm allows for the curation of the perfect response. You can take your time crafting replies, consulting friends or family, or even doing some research before responding. While this can lead to polished conversations, it may not always reflect the spontaneity and authenticity of in-person interactions.
Conclusion
Online dating has built a negative reputation over the years, but if used correctly, it can be a valuable tool that helps create beautiful marriages. Dating apps offer functions that real life simply can't. If you're single and ready to mingle, I'd highly recommend giving online dating a try! You'd be surprised at how well it works.
What do you think of online dating? Did you meet your spouse online? I want to hear your thoughts!
Have you tried online dating?
Yes
No
Where did you meet your spouse?
Online
Church
Mutual Connection
Gym
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